Funny poems



One two

buckle the truth

Three four

warp it some more

Five six

give it a twist

Seven eight

never be straight

Nine ten



A Blue day poem

I’m having an unproductive day

I’m feeling rather blue

The sky is dull and dreary and

I don’t know what to do


My head feels like it’s full of wool

My hands are cold and numb

I wish that I was clever

But I’m feeling kind of dumb


I think that I’ll go back to bed

And write myself a letter

Perhaps a poem – one that rhymes

Will help me to feel better


I give up – I’ve tried and tried

It’s just too hard I know it

Instead I think I’ll go to sleep

And dream that I’m a poet



To Bend the Truth


The truth can be buckled

perverted or bent

Embellished or trimmed

to disguise what you meant

Twizzled and twisted


Distorted in gross altered



Bath Time

At the end of the day
when it’s time for a bath
It’s a bit of a joke
but I try not to laugh.

Mum always nags and insists that I rub

from my head to my toes
cause she thinks I’m a grub


And it isn’t her job
to scrub dirt from my skin
and she’s tired of cleaning
the mess I get in


And she says I must soak
in the bath, not the shower…


…then she scrubs
at the ring round the tub
for an hour!



Aren’t you sick of dragons?

Whatever’s all the fuss?

I’ll bet that all the dragons

Could care less ‘bout all of us.


Aren’t you sick of wizards?

At least the younger kind

The ones who go to wizard school

And leave us all behind


Aren’t you sick of fairies?

Flitting through the air

I’ve heard they hate collecting teeth

They’d rather do their hair


And aren’t you sick of magic?

You know it isn’t real

It’s not that I’m a sceptic

I’m just sharing how I feel


But I’m rather fond of witches

Especially when they’re green

And because I’m feeling grumpy

I prefer them when they’re mean




One Response to Funny poems

  1. I love these poems Jackie – especially the one about having a bad writing day!

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